Don E. Gibbons, Ph.D., NJ Licensed Psychologist #03513
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The New Center for Counseling and Psychotherapy, LLC

The New Center for Counseling and Psychotherapy, LLC, is located at 703 Mill Creek Road, Suite G #1, Manahawkin, NJ 08050. Telephone us at(609)709-2043 and(609) 709-0009. We will welcome you warmly and will work together with you to develop a plan which is individually suited to your goals, utilizing a variety of therapeutic approaches including cognitive behavioral, family systems, psychodynamic, humanistic, and eclectic approaches as well as hypnosis. We accept Medicare and most other major insurance. Weekend and evening office hours are available.

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Premature Ejaculation Treated with CBT and Suggestion-Enhanced Experience

The most important sex organ is the brain!
Although it is not always necessary to employ a formal induction, it is possible to include positive suggestions of enhanced experience (hyperempiria) in an approach to treatment. Several years ago, I saw a nineteen year old, newly-married male client, who had grown up in a strict Baptist household, as had his wife. His previous experience with women was extremely limited. He had not learned to hold himself back when he and his wife were about to make love, and always climaxed too soon. His wife did not participate in the sessions, due to an expressed reluctance to discuss such intimate topics with anyone but her husband. Because of his strict Baptist upbringing, he rejected the idea of hypnosis. Therefore, my treatment was a combination of support and encouragement, positive suggestion, and cognitive-behavioral therapy.
First, the client was reassured that his responses were perfectly normal. I explained that most young males need to learn to restrain their natural tendency to "let go" in response to their first sexual contacts with a woman.
In discussing his feelings for his wife, the client agreed that the most erotically arousing stimulus imaginable was to experience her in the throes of orgasm, which she had previously attained fairly quickly through heavy petting. He also reported that his wife was multi-orgasmic during these times, but one or two climaxes was all that he was able to manage. His wife had expressed disdain for mechanical vibrators, ribbed condoms, and the like, stating, "They aren't you!"
I assured him that he was extremely fortunate in having a multi-orgasmic wife whom he would be able to pleasure repeatedly as he acquired a greater degree of control. As the couple gained more familiarity with each other's bodies, all of his efforts were to be directed toward attaining this goal of pleasuring her as frequently and as intensely as possible, which took his mind off himself.
He was encouraged to frankly and openly discuss with his wife how they liked to be touched, and to continue to talk during intercourse, exchanging tender words and encouraging the types of stimulation that would be most satisfying at the moment.
The client was instructed to make the foreplay as long and drawn out as possible, with maximum clitoral stimulation for the wife, repeatedly leading her as close to orgasm as possible without actually achieving it unless she insisted. This could be either manual or oral, or both. Without revealing this to his wife, as the couple began to have intercourse and he felt that he was about to "let go," he was instructed to slow down and think of a series of the grossest, most repulsive things he possibly could as he began to make love, and the more tempted he feel to let go, the stronger he needed to make these images, until they filled his mind completely! The images were to be individually chosen by the client to make sure that they would be as repulsive as he could make them.
I also explained that it was okay to even stop once in a while, if he needed to, explaining, "It's just too good -- I have to stop a minute." The wife would recognize this a tribute to her femininity and to the intensity of her husband's desire for her.
The client was assured, as the lovemaking continued at a slower pace and his adaptation level gradually built up as he and his wife grew more used to each other's carnal presence, he would be able to tolerate more and more intense stimulation until his and his wife's respective arousal levels were more evenly matched. He was also instructed that it might take some time for his control to build up to the necessary level, but he was assured that if he practiced this restraint training, he would eventually be successful.
He was seen for a total of ten sessions, weekly at first for the first three sessions, and then spread out over the course of a three-month period, and at the end of this time he reported that after their arousal levels had become more closely matched, he and his wife had learned to enhance the meaningfulness of their relationship still more through various techniques of foreplay which he had previously found to be too arousing. 

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Suggestion-enhanced Orgasms

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The Blog contains many other examples of experience as an art form, for the enhancement of human potential, the ennoblement of the human spirit, and the fulfillment of human existence.


See also the following print sources:

Gibbons, D. E. (2001). Experience as an art form. .New York, NY: Authors Choice Press.

Gibbons, D. E. (2000). Applied hypnosis and hyperempiria. Lincoln, NE: Authors Choice Press (originally published 1979 by Plenum Press).

Gibbons, D. E., & Cavallaro, L (2013).. Exploring alternate universes: And learning what they can teach us. Amazon Kindle E-Books. (Note: It is not necessary to own a Kindle reader to download this e-book, as the Kindle app may be downloaded free of charge to a standard desktop or laptop computer and to most cell phones.)

Gibbons, D. E., & Lynn, S. J. (2010). Hypnotic inductions: A primer. in S. J. Lynn, J. W. Rhue, & I. Kirsch (Eds.) Handbook of clinical hypnosis, 2nd ed. Washington, DC: American Psychological Association, pp. 267-291.



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